Truth Within

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nfortunately, I am not always tactful, which sometimes lands me in trouble with others. Just last night, I allowed myself to be baited into responding to what seemed to me a slur on my character. The conversation ended badly and I was left with a mound of regret. Although I sought to make peace with God before lying down, I knew that I would have to eventually reach out to the other person and make peace with them.

Upon arising, the following chorus was playing in my head: “Oh Lord, just for today; help me to walk this narrow way; help me to live above the world; where satan’s darts at me are hurled.”

Oh! Could I ever relate to that message. The enemy had thrown me a curb ball and I had swung and missed. Strike three! Game over? Or was it? The inning might be over, but there is more game to be played and I had earned another day; another inning. Then I read Psalms 51:6 which says: “And yes, you want truth in the most hidden places; you teach me wisdom in the most secret space.”  Common English Bible (CEB) - Copyright © 2011 by Common English Bible

Although this was a jab to my conscience: I knew that there was help to be had. There is no way that I can hide anything from God; and although the person made a sarcastic remark, which triggered my response, I knew in my heart, that I was in error for responding as I did. Yes, when I sought for the truth within my own soul, it revealed itself. I’m so glad that I was encouraged to at least look for it.

Therefore, with the contrite heart David mentions in the same Psalms, I prayed to swallow my pride, and to do what I knew was the right thing to do. I know that at times I am tactless, but in my innermost being, I know that I cannot afford to continue in that vein. Additionally, when my feelings are involved, I need to cry out to God for deliverance from ME! From my failures and shortcomings; I can’t just say, “That’s how I am”. I’ve got to seek Christ for the change that must be made in me, and be willing to allow the change to be made.

I know that this is not the last time that I’ll be challenged in this matter; I pray that next time, I will just pause – take a deep breath and bear up beneath the pain that comes with self-control. I am praying to the end that victory will one day be mine in totally; I solicit your prayers on my behalf. But, thankfully, I’m learning today’s little life lesson, which really is not so little at all.

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